Herckamer and the Tale of the Trees — Author Unknown

Herckamer Jones had a desperately boring life. Having graduated high school, barely, he acquires the unenviable job of selling real estate in a small town in Tennessee, and he isn't too good at it. He passes the time reading books and watching old movies on television. And he has a cat. But everything changes when he gets a letter from a company called U.E.E. Consolidated offering him a commission to buy a land property. Herckamer takes the job, never suspecting that he has just gone to work for the last elves on earth. And that's when his troubles begin.