Two Crazy: Fickle Finger of Fate — Margaret Lashley

The world is not a safe place for figurines. When you're pushing 50 with an industrial bulldozer, birthdays can be a bitch. What was intended as a gag gift for Val ends up making her gag alright - and lands her in a whole heap of trouble with the law. With one hot cop on her tail and a mean one on her trail, Val turns to old friends and new ones to help prove she's not into human dismemberment. Who's the good cop? Who's the bad? And who's the dwarf in the Halloween mask? Will a pair of falsies help Val stumble onto the truth? If not, she's got to rely on her wacky, beach-bum friends if she's going to escape the fickle finger of fate. Two Crazy is a satirical look at how life seems to take pleasure in screwing up our well-laid plans. It's told through the eyes of a snarky, middle-aged woman with major trust issues and dubious, yet highly original coping skills. If you like deeply flawed characters and laugh-out-loud situations, you'll love Absolute Zero. It's the third book in Margaret Lashley's hilarious, irreverent Val & Pals Series.