Too Many Tsunamis — Vincent Pienaar

Life's a drag, and nobody knows that better than Bert. Bert wants to write. He
also wants to kill himself. He has composed a brilliant suicide note, but so far
his attempt at a brilliant suicide is as devoid of success as his writing career.
Not wanting to die wondering if his mother will fully comprehend his
note, Bert sets out to explain himself â€" in a footnote. A footnote that keeps
growing and growing like a monster wave.
Bert carries on living, for now, recounting his string of doomed relationships,
and bemoaning his dead-end job in a printing shop, and the fact that
he's 34 and still living with his mother.
But into the shop walks the mysterious Lelani Balt â€" Lightning Bolt â€" and
sparks begin to fly. Bert might finally have something to write about.