DEAD as a doorpost — Naomi Kramer

John's dead.

He's pretty happy about it, actually.

So's his wife, Melissa.

Linda, on the other hand, suspects foul play - and she's not going to rest until she finds out what happened.

This is a very short book - novelette length - around 10 000 words or 40 (print) pages.

Warning: Contains frequent foul language, adult themes, and Aussie insults. Not suitable for children.

John says:
So I died. So I don't remember how I died. I'm dead, I'm in heaven. That sounds like a happy ending to me. So why does Linda care so much? I don't.

Melissa says:
I've been mooning around heaven for years waiting for my husband to turn up. He finally makes it, and he's joined at the hip to a blonde tart who thinks clothes are 'like, so lame'. I am not happy.

Mack says:
I'm madder than a roo with sunstroke. I know nothing. Leave me alone!

Linda says:
There's something really weird going on here, and I want to know what, #### it.