Brown River Queen — Frank Tuttle

When the banshee howls, start looking for the lifeboats.

Take a simple, three-day cruise on a lavish steamboat casino, they said. Just keep an eye out for trouble while the Regent rolls the dice, they said. Markhat should have known the maiden voyage of Avalante's vampire-crewed Brown River Queen would be anything but a finder's dream job. Especially when he charges a ridiculous fee--and gets it without a peep of protest. Then a pair of identical murderous maidens attack him and his lady love, and it doesn't take a banshee's howl to confirm his sinking suspicion he's about to earn his fee the hard way. As the heavily guarded steamboat casts off, Markhat is forced to navigate shoals of old enemies, treacherous political undercurrents, and rogue waves of assassins. All to keep the walking dead from turning the Brown River Queen's decks red with blood.

Warning: This is a work of fiction. Please stop trying to apply it as a cream directly to your forehead. The characters depicted herein are quite real despite this disclaimer and will be deeply hurt if you peek ahead to the ending. This prose is certified gluten-free. Not intended as an emergency substitute Flight Manual, no matter what the nerds at Popular Mechanics claim.