"It's just so stupid, Brandy asking us to write our lives for homework!
I remember enough things on my life to keep me writing for about a million hours."
As Alice struggles with her class assignment for Miss Brand, she discovers that she has even more to say about her life than she thought. Most of it's too private to write for school, so she decides to record her autobiography in a secret notebook. There she writes about the mess between her mother, a "professional single parent," her actress grandmother, who "loves her to distraxion," but keeps interfering and having rows with her mum, and a dad she's never seen.