You'd Be Surprised — Peter Cheyney

Blood's runnin' down my face from where this guy's just bust me, my nose feels like it's split in half. Then this dame gets up an' strolls over to me - I reckon I am not lookin' quite so good.

She says: 'Well for cryin' out loud.'

Is this my big day or is it?

She stands lookin' at me, sippin' champagne. 'So you're a big "G" man,' she says. 'Well, personally, if you hadn't got a lot comin' to you I would take a bust at you myself, you lousy, crawlin', gum-shoein' dick. Have a drop of liquor, big boy.' She pours the contents of her glass over my face. It stings like hell, but I'm tellin' you it was good liquor.